Bad dreams….

I can always tell when I wake up if I had bad dreams or not…. and if they are extreme in their violence I usually wake up with a scream on my lips or major headache…

Those things haven’t been happening… Instead what ever the dream or nightmare is… it only impacts me for the first hour I am awake then it fades away… just as the past is fading away…

Memories are a complicated subject… When I was curious about my own past and never could get anyone to say anything that would be medically helpful… ya know from your mom or dad, who are supposed to know about your childhood injuries… I was told of none… really sad when ya think about it… these 2 adults are typical of fake christians in America… Hiding behind religion, because to be a man or woman took too much effort…

As for memories… With TBI’s you never know what memory sector of your brain will be impacted unless you know where you received the trauma to your brain… Since I have no such medical information, we have to go with the headaches and the indention on the right side of my skull, which you can feel with your fingers…

Once I understood that information… I knew that infarct and strokes usually only impact the short-term memory section and most of the time people will go straight into physical therapy to learn the things they forgot…

Losing your long-term memory is much more complicated and still there is a lot they don’t know… They really need to live inside the brain of someone who is actually living with lost memories….

I had no say on what I remember and don’t remember… When the shrink at El Paso mentioned what he thought my memory ability was, I wasn’t surprised… I always found it odd that I could remember things in great detail… probably why my boss’s in the federal government didn’t like me… I blew the whistle on lots of abuse… cost me a couple of jobs in the process… and the corruption continues under Trump and the GOP… sorry I digress…

As for the memories… I can remember my being hit at about 18 months old with the hair brush… being a baby and never hearing the stories my mother told, I had no other information on that incident… yet when I brought it up to my mother…it was as if she saw a ghost and she realized, I could remember all the way back to my toddler days…

What she didn’t know was that I had big holes in my memories… in fact years were missing… When I confronted her about it in 2010, she refused to provide any information… She got her final revenge on a child she never wanted… she withheld vital medical information… That was the last time I saw the woman I called mother… What I call her now, isn’t printable…

So I went thru psych testing in 2011 at the El Paso VA and the results were not surprising… Above average intelligence… suffers from PTSD due to her illness and he told me possible Edetic memory ability… The doctor and I did not know about the TBI at that time… I would learn that on November 7, 2017, which I have written about… that hot night in Big Springs, Texas….

So when people say they remember what went down when they were 3 or 5… It is very doubtful, unless they have been coached… something like that went on with my granddaughters… when the truth comes out, the other parent will have some explaining to do… Sorry, I digress…

It is normal for the average person to see something happen and 30 seconds later, they can NOT give you detailed information… That is just the human brain in action… That’s why multiple witness’s are needed, so that the stories can be compared and find the common thread in the memory…

My attention to detail, cost me every time I opened my mouth in that christian household… It wasn’t truth, honesty, integrity or morales, values or ethics those adults wanted… They wanted mini me’s…. I refused and got beaten more times than I remember… but my body never forgot… the internal scars are extensive and the people in that household should have rotted in prison…

Instead they raised children to lie, steal, cheat, rape and abuse…. so my parents got what they wanted in all their kids… except me… 

I refused to buy into their fake religion, fake god or fake values… You learn real quick in this type of household how to tell the difference between fake and real and you always know how to spot a con…. Trump was obvious from the first word he uttered… makes you wonder why the bigots in America are tolerated… oh yea.. it’s America… seems like such a BS comment though..

Volcano generated weather…

TimesUp #MeToo

I Remember…..

Author: maggi9454

My earliest memory is before the age of 2... by the time I was 13, I had no childhood memories... No holidays, no birthdays... On 11/5/17 a shooter in Texas changed all that... It triggered my memories from my 13th year... The Air Force covered it up an it happened in Big Springs, Texas 1967... Domestic violence, PTSD, TBI and I too served in the Air Force 10 years later... This is my story to remember what was stolen...

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