Life long desire to write….

I have been an avid reader until about 10 years ago… read anything and everything that held my interest… started out reading all the kid books, then moved onto novels and then onto the romance junk and then I stopped… The romantic ideas and stories rang so hollow and false… even the great novels of the world, didn’t seem to really touch on the reality of the world I was living in… yet, I always wanted to write… a secret I told no one until after Nov 7, 2017, when Margie strolled, hopped and skipped back into my life…

I got excited at first, when this journey began… I was going to accomplish what I always wanted to do… write and I finally had something to write about… Margie….

Along the way, the doctor took me seriously and started running tests a year ago in June and she is not done… nothing happens fast, when it comes to veterans health care….

We learned about the illness caused by domestic violence… we learned I have repressed memories and still do, not all has been revealed and we know I have TBI’s and PTSD….

I would be lying if I didn’t say everyday is a challenge… old habits die-hard and Margie walking back into my life brought a great deal of pain, anguish, emotionally and physically and most of all she brought forth the anger…….. and she set me free….

The freedom she gave me comes at a cost… I have been bitch slapped by reality so many times in the last 10 months, my soul and brain are bruised all over… yet, I Remember….

The chaos is the biggest challenge, I can tell when the headache hits, my thought process is going on recess and my writing will reflect it, if you go back and follow the pattern of attacks… the writing is not consistent… Seizures may be the culprit… a test in 2 weeks will tell me if that is so…

If it is not seizures, then my conjecture is this… the brain is still adjusting to the reality of domestic violence done in the name of a god… and those persons are the ones that brought me into this world, so they could control it…. and it is hard to accept the reality that your own family would harm you so….

Though I am learning as I take this journey with Margie… Learning to accept… learning to look to the future and not the past… Accepting that the past will be with me until I put this to rest and the book is done…

Learning to listen to Margie and tell her story with her voice…. The Circle of Silence is no more…

TimesUp #MeToo

I Remember…..

Author: Adorable Spite

Domestic violence is an old song, sung thru the ages like a hymn and purported to be the way christians live their lives... full of deceit, hate, bigotry and most of all fear... It is that fear that cost me my virginity, my soul and most of all my humanity... I had to fight to keep the christians hands off my soul, but they stole from my body and so did the U. S. Air Force... Rape and attempted murder... but image was more important... Vance AFB and Webb AFB... #WhyIDidntTell #MeToo TimesUP, Circle of Silence is no more....