Brain Waves and the ride….

Like a roller coaster… I think not… its way more complicated than that and to use technical terms, would confuse you and me… that simple… this process is anything but easy and tranquil…

It is topsy-turvy when it happens and now that I know for a fact it happens… thanks to 2 EEGs… it is something I told Mike about …. several months ago about how I can feel the transition and change when the brain is going to kick into another phase of brain fog and neuropathy… right now… I am free of that phase and I knew when it happened….

I can no more explain this, than I can explain why Trump is president… it’s a mystery of the brain that has been injured… but one I have lived with, and I am sure that it started with the first attack over the TV interview… or something along that line… remember… hypnosis, so I can see all of the memory, not just bits and pieces….

When the action happens and it has been doing this for at least 58 years… which if you ask me those shrinks I saw in 1982… should have their license’s pulled for not doing a EEG before trying to diagnose me based on a paper test…. you just can not fix stupid… but the one in 98 was paper and EEG and that is what makes this so interesting….

If I had never asked my mother about the missing memory…we would not be having this little confab…. that I can guarantee…. suspicion without corroboration is not good enough for me… so when mother confirmed it… that was the beginning of the end of her secrets and she knew it… she just isn’t as smart as I am… for all the bashing of my reputation she does… if you were not there when something happened… and you believe her over me… that’s okay… you can’t fix stupid, stupid has to want to fix itself…. easy, peasy….

So right now… I am clear of the fog that goes with the abnormal brain waves… it may last a short time or it could last a long time… just depends on my attitude, amount of rest I get and with a rooster next door, well, lets just say cooked rooster sounds good right now… but other than that… 

I finally get why I feel what I feel in my brain and I have only 3 people in this world to thank for those injuries… 1 is dead… the other bat shit crazy mother and the last one… well, I can’t answer that one… psychic I am not… you would have to be a shrink to figure that one out…. Or ask her, doubt if you will get truth tho……

Wrapping my head around the fact that my mother was abusive from the time I was a toddler until I cut her out of my life 63 years later… that is the tough one…

I did it with Don (dad)… and in time I will do it with her… my siblings are just a by-product of abuse and their choice to hide from reality… it’s their world… I have no desire to enter it again…

I prefer reality and its coldness and the adventures in life that I live… not hide from….

So yep, I am a happy camper… I get the behavior of the brain waves and what I told hubby the doctors confirmed… in the end… I was right and the doctors were wrong… really sad, when you think how many combat veterans we have and the poor health care they shove upon us… none of us are rich and none of us can afford insurance… we wore a uniform and swore an oath… we kept our bargain….

America forgot to keep theirs…. but, there is always HOPE… just never give up on yourself… I didn’t…

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie…

Author: maggi9454

Margie was born into a typical christian military family... Her story is anything but typical... Domestic violence, rape, attempted murder and all done while my dad served in the U. S. Air Force and they buried the truth... then my own children impacted by Air Force cover up while I am active duty.... Rape, Attempted murder, domestic violence and discrimination in the name of the United States Government... and it is still happening as I write... just look at Trump, Kavanaugh and Thomas.... Circle of Silence is no more....