Memories used to cause questions…

At one time, every memory that came to mind… I would try to figure out when, where, why, how… etc…. At one time….

Now when the memory comes forward, and again… nothing new, nothing I didn’t already know, it just shows its connections to the rest of the memories….

I have lots of pleasant memories… outside my parents house, after I left home…. but any memories connected to my life before 18…. there is not one good memory that is not connected to a violent memory…. and this is why….

I said before with TBI… the science says… you will do one of the following and it is very rare to remember all three….

1… You either remember the before, means you knew what happened before the incident…

2… You remember the incident….

3… You remember the after part of when you got hurt….

With TBI, with all I have read about the psychology part and how we make and store memories… it makes so much sense, why you don’t remember all 3…. and there are moments when I am glad I don’t remember all 3…..

Can’t tell you what memories I am referring too, I am working on a book….

For me, my brain held onto the bad memories, so that when I finally woke up… it would be there to feed the hunger I would feel, with wanting to know what, when, where, why, how and most of those questions… will never be answered… most of the people directly involved in the cover up are dead….

It’s on me to fill in the blanks and that is a high mountain to climb… how am I going to know if I am right, with no one to back up the memory… most would quit now… but I have a curiosity that wants satisfying… so work at it I must, until my brain revolts, like the body is doing…

Its called old age….

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie….

Author: maggi9454

Margie was born into a typical christian military family... Her story is anything but typical... Domestic violence, rape, attempted murder and all done while my dad served in the U. S. Air Force and they buried the truth... then my own children impacted by Air Force cover up while I am active duty.... Rape, Attempted murder, domestic violence and discrimination in the name of the United States Government... and it is still happening as I write... just look at Trump, Kavanaugh and Thomas.... Circle of Silence is no more....