PTSD & TBI Comfort Zone, is the Twilight Zone…

When I pushed to get hubby tested last year, I knew something was way wrong… If it wasn’t him… it was me… so now we joke, I got him tested… but it was so important at that moment in time last summer… because I knew… something was about to happen….

It wasn’t but a few weeks after we got Mikes test results that the shooter on Nov 5, 2017 killed 26 people in a town in Texas… 2 days later, Margie started talking and the rest is in all these blogs… that thought just left me weak… wow…

I have had friends who had mental illness, schizophrenia, bi-polar (split personality), depression and just mental illness…. and I could relate to each and every one of them… because I was living it… the bi-polar especially… only because Margie had been fighting Maggi for decades to be heard… and once her voice was no longer silent… it has been an interesting road trip going through my past….

If you take thyroid med, you might have a clue what I am talking about… if your dosage isn’t right you will either be over the top with hormones and if you are a woman, they will blame menopause… and if you aren’t getting enough hormone, your brain is in confusion at varying degrees… I know, experienced it this morning… the med had worn off and not built up in my system yet… new dosage…

Or another good example if you smoke pot… you get one strain that is so strong, you lose all track of time or anything you did, and you don’t remember doing things… that is what PTSD & TBI do to me…

It’s not as bad as it used to be… now, headache, and I associate that with what ever happens during that time, I am aware and able to maintain the focus, that wasn’t there before… because of the PTSD & TBI…

You never get pass the TBI if you have permanent memory loss, which until I get the MRI done, which will be when the VA gets off their ass, 3 weeks and counting… or if the Neuro does more tests… I just don’t have those answers yet…. I may get them before I see the doctor on my own, and I may not… this is when you need the college educated… they did pass tests…

I know from what I have learned, some symptoms related to TBI may never go away, because after all the brain, the most important muscle we have… was damaged… and it takes time for it to rewire and compensate for the damage…

I made a comment to a doctor before about how I could feel things going on in my body and brain and you would have thought I was a UNICORN… the look they gave me… then in the last few years, science says people who have sustained damage like I did, to the brain and body… can feel everything going on inside them… my current doc thought I was nuts too…  now she listens… maybe not hear… but she is learning….

The brain, the best toy nature ever gave a sentient being… and add a shaker of believing in yourself, well, lets just say, the past is finally becoming the past…

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie….