PTSD won today….

Lack of sleep is the worse thing I need… It takes any kind of patience I might have had and throws it straight out the window….

New neighbors down the street, about an acre away and all of a sudden all you hear is singing… and I have to turn the news up, so I can hear the TV in my own home… this is what we left New Mexico because of… 

Bangers that drive up and down the street playing noise so loud, you can hear it on the toilet and that is blocks, if not half a mile away… and you get a vibration of your whole house, as you sit on that toilet… oh yea for stupid….

PTSD, for me, does not like loud noise… I don’t like loud music… Went to one concert to see Hank Williams Jr. and I couldn’t leave the venue fast enough…. Went to see a movie with the grandkids in 2013… the first time in over 20 years I went in a theatre… 

I noticed when I was a teenager, I really didn’t like loud music or noises… and when we went to the bar… the only way I could cope… drink… after I was drunk, I didn’t care about the loud noise….

Drinking is not part of my life… neither is loud noise… thus the desire to move to the east side of Washington and buy 20 acres and have that peace and quiet I so long for and have longed for, since I was a child…

Today I get in the mail the authorization from the VA for the MRI and any other tests they want to do, as well as the doctor being approved to see me…

No one told me, when I put a military uniform as a woman… I would have to sell my soul and prostitute my self respect just to get health care… after defective surgical gloves exposed me and other airman to hepatitis C and a host of other illness’…. one airman did get Hep C… They found a parasite in me… 

I love my country… but my country does not love its veterans…. been over 30 days since the doctor asked for a brain MRI…

I still have NO appointment for any such MRI…. 100% service connected veteran… how do you think the kids coming back from war are going to handle this… 40 years of this and nothing has gotten better for veterans… if anything, it went in the crapper the minute Trump lied he was protecting the nation… instead, he has made this 100% about him, and the Nation well, he sold us to the Company Store….

But Trump wants a parade and wall… You can not fix stupid, stupid has to want to fix its self…

all Veterans want, is what we earned….

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie….

Author: Adorable Spite

Domestic violence is an old song, sung thru the ages like a hymn and purported to be the way christians live their lives... full of deceit, hate, bigotry and most of all fear... It is that fear that cost me my virginity, my soul and most of all my humanity... I had to fight to keep the christians hands off my soul, but they stole from my body and so did the U. S. Air Force... Rape and attempted murder... but image was more important... Vance AFB and Webb AFB... #WhyIDidntTell #MeToo TimesUP, Circle of Silence is no more....

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