Neurology here we come… edited…

What a day… the headaches have transversed up my neck, through the right, frontal, parietal and left lobe and it’s like party time with my eyes not wanting to work and one wants to be closed and confusion decides it needs to be in the mix…. and I am trying to make myself eat dinner, because breakfast the dogs got and lunch got skipped… enough already…. now I wish our pot was mature, I could use a nice healthy bowl of the medical stuff right now…. OUCH!! left eye hurts!!!

It is vindication that finally someone listened and heard my pleas of help… and I have all the inside hope you can possibly have… but…

I am struggling to do everyday things, I am dealing with confusion when I am in the middle of something I have done millions of times and that is no exaggeration… I am constantly having to pay attention to how I walk and place my feet, because it feels like I am wearing tri-focols and it’s the wrong prescription…. 

The headaches are the worse and the shooting pain that comes from my carotid artery… that is a symptom I have had since I went in the military and was told more than once it was nothing…. shoulder dropping, head bowing kind of sigh… arrogance of the college educated and that fucking ego they think they deserve…

I am living proof, none of the doctors I have dealt with deserve that designation… Doctor… to be a doctor… YOU HAVE TO LISTEN AND HEAR!!!!!!!

This neurologist is someone I have zero respect for… only because hubby saw him, just before I got my memories back and his body language every time I opened my mouth was absolutely misogynistic and rude and most of all disrespectful to me… since I was the one paying the bills…. so seeing him, gives me no pleasure, but I need the morons education, the one thing I do not have…

I can only go so far on this high IQ and I will need help, you know what they say about representing yourself in court, when you can have a lawyer… yep, I am in a catch 22… I need this kids brain and I hope he is smart enough to be worth my time and effort….

and I literally collapse in my chair… I know this kind of man… thus, why I can read them… so it should be fun… hope the pot is ready by then… smoke a nice joint before I go in his office and I might just be nice… maybe, okay put an emoji of a devil here… hubby is already expecting me to put the kid in his place… done it before and to bigger fish than this kid…

The head hurts and it won’t quit hurting… I can remember as a child telling my Freda (mother) that something hurt and she would tell me to leave it alone… after a few years of being told the same thing… you just learn to suffer in silence… and I did… until I went in the military…. and 41 years later… I am finally getting some answers…

I learned when I was active duty and had to deal with lots of officers… that college educated did not make you smart… because all I have seen is lots of stupid, arrogant, egotistical kids who think they are doing you a favor instead of doing the job they signed up for… the oath they swore… to be a healer and do no harm…

I don’t think any of the doctors I have seen except for a couple, ever believed that oath… must be why people like Trump are in charge… it’s not about health care… it’s about money… and mismanagement of the VA health care system…

Because of the shut down… who knows when the approval will come in for the needed MRI to see if that fistula is a current bleed in my brain…

Life has no value to people like Trump… it’s about image and money…

The basis of this story… the image of the Air Force was more important than my health… this stroke I suffered…

Big Springs, Texas…. 1967/68… and by March of 68 we were getting our shots, to be shipped off to Japan… We had only been at Webb AFB a few months, when Don & Freda, tried to kill me…still wrapping my head around the reality of what these people did to a little girl….

those arms have blunt force trauma an little finger is broken, the face, torso an legs badly bruised… how do you do this to a child???I was forced to smile for this picture or get hit again… never liked my picture taken after this…I was only 6 years old….

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie…

Sgt. USAF DAV