Dear Diary I am 13 years old and the world changed forever…

No birthday celebration… I have no memory… only, mom went into labor on my birthday and the new baby was on its way…

Sometime the next morning a child was born…

Daddy working his military job and his part-time job at the bowling alley on base… trying to keep all us kids fed and clothed… now a new baby…

Tension in the house was great and many a night we heard the rumbling of words as we drifted off to sleep or woke up to the sounds of loud voices…

One night mommy started in on daddy… he was tired and the weight of so many on his shoulders was more than he wanted… Mommy wanted to escape, not the world she dreamed of and made up in her mind…

First it was words as daddy walked in the front door… by the time he had made it to their bedroom, she was enraged, she wanted a fight and she was going to get one…

First the slap and him swinging back… a thud against a wall, a muffled curse…. and another blow and another thud on the wall….

Two bedroom doors opened, mine and big brother… we stepped into that small hall and like all stupid people, jumped right in the middle of swinging fists and flailing bodies…

I heard screams and cries… I heard a baby in the back ground…. I heard brother being beaten on and turn to help him and I am knocked against a wall… all 60 or so pounds of me as I slumped to the floor, feeling the blows of a mad man on my little body…. and darkness…

Sweet darkness… silence so golden I could hear my last breath escape my lips….

My next memory… Mommy is being told her mother has passed away, this is June 1968… 10 months after the new baby had been born and daddy had orders to go to Japan… a scandal had happened that night in Big Springs, Texas…

Life just got very interesting… what happened to those 10 months???

I am hoping for bad dreams….

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell 

I Remember… Margie… before the lights went out…

Sgt. USAF DAV