Memory Triggers, You just never know…in memory of Robin Ackley Pruitt

I had gone to bed, spending my day, marveling at the loss of a friend, who remembered me, but I had no memory of her…. and it still impacted me… her sudden death…

Psychology and neurology, you got to give it to the kids that go to school… it is one fascinating subject and when you are the one living the text-book junk… it is like being in the movie “A Wrinkle in Time”…. which was an okay movie… but the concept behind the story was brilliant…

My voice was silenced at one time by christians and men in power… once that voice started squeaking out it’s refusal to be shackled by man any longer… she got a new label… Bitch… and I smile and think of Lindsey Graham and Kavanaugh and their contorted faces of rage of getting caught with their hands up a womans skirt… and I melt back and think of the courage it took for Professor Ford to come forward… she is my kind of hero… not Graham or Kavanaugh or Trump…. they are they takers and destroyers of the world… they sold their humanity to the highest bidder, christianity and it is showing on their faces every day… much like Dorian Grey….

As I drifted off to sleep, I asked my brain, let me dream of Robin… let me see the friendship she valued so much, she accepted me, damaged goods and all…

Instead I got sleep, no dreams that I know of at all… my waking mind and my sleeping mind… denying me my memories….

I once told Mike, I can’t love you the way you love me… I can’t do that with anyone… it’s not in me… that was before I knew of the stroke and it’s location and the damage that sector of the brain can do to a person’s emotional ability…. maybe why I like the character Spock so much or Sheldon Cooper on Big Bang…. but…

I lose out on so much, because I do not have that ability… not that I don’t want it… if it’s not there, it’s not there… just like being born LGBTQ is no different… reality is… what I live… I have no other choice, I wasn’t given one…

We are working furiously to make an offer on a house… we hope to have a contract in place by Friday of next week… so excited…. maybe that is why I slept so good… we made a choice… the conflict is over….

I will miss my friend, even though I do not remember her from my youth… I value the friendship we nurtured over the past few years… I will always be happy I kept that picture from Johnson AFB in base housing as we were going to school with her name written under it… I got to know her twice…. she will be missed… much love on your next journey Robin Ackley Pruitt….

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell

I Remember… Margie… who loved adventure…

Sgt. USAF DAV