TBI, the Unfiltered Mouth…

I truly wish I could tell you if I have always been some what, likely, totally or completely unfiltered my whole life… you could say a TBI can give you the impression the person is Autistic, when in the real world of brain injuries… you just have no filter or you choose not to have a filter…

Trump choses not to have a filter and most people who think they are a god are just like Trump… ouch that sounded a lot like christians…

I can remember the TV beating and I know that I spoke truth when interviewed… just not the pretty made up world Freda wanted, but the truth as I saw it at 5 years old… that beating left me with a brain injury, that I have no doubt… because of other memories that have come forward… it is beyond twilight zone doing this head road trip…. and the tunnel with the light in it flash’s before my eyes… getting so close within reach…. I just keep reaching….

I know when the Texas near death and severe brain injury happened, I was reasonably unfiltered, for a 13 year old… I said what I thought and usually already thought out the consequences for saying the words, which as usual… were truth… just not christians form of truth and their form I will never be able to do… why??? because of where they damaged my brain when I was a child… my short term memory will always suck, no matter how many note pads I have around the house and it has been that way since I was 5 years old… they took my ability to lie away from me… I can’t remember one, just that simple… but I sure can remember when they told theirs… lol…. love this memory crap coming back…

After the stroke at 13 and subsequent mini stroke at 14 and 17…. I lost all my childhood, either through self preservation or the bleed smothered the brain cells holding the memories… and I really thought I would not get any memories back after I told Freda in 2010 I was missing memory…

The neurologist here on Hawaii, says he saw no reason why I wouldn’t get them back… and that tells me, it’s all up to just how unfiltered I want my mind to be or am I going to continue to fight to keep the memories buried??? Good question… and it will be a argument I have mentally more times than I can count, some days Maggi wins, most days Margie wins… and a flash of Texas drifted by… cataracts and all, the memories are seen as if they are happening at that very moment… better than a roller coaster ride…

My anger is the part of me that I want filtered and controlled… Mike is a good partner to deal with this part of the issue… its not violent or aggressive, but he can see the anger or passion when I talk of things done to me or mine…. you can’t make this stuff up, that is why I know my PTSD started as early as 5 years old… I will be 65 in a few days…

Do I want to control the unfiltered part of my brain injury, some days yes, other days it’s better to let loose than end up in jail for trying to fix stupid… True story, mouth is safer than some of the things I think of to fix that stupid…

TimesUp #MeToo WhyIDidntTell, because Trump thinks all women are easy to handle and his religious base is so morally corrupt they give over their children for sacrifice…

Sgt. USAF DAV I remember… Margie…