The Nightmares are Back….edited….

One pattern I noticed a long time ago… damn I am getting old… but a pattern has emerged that I recognize more clearly now…

When I am in pain for something other than what the parents and sibling did… it interfers with my nightmares… it’s a new pain and I have to figure out a way to cope… I have never been a narcotic pain pill person, stuff makes me puke… so I have alternative ways of coping with pain… but…

When it’s your mouth, all bets are off and frankly, mouth pain or tooth pain can be as painful as childbirth… nothing like passing stones, which I did in 16… and I had 2 natural childbirths… I would rather do those things than have mouth pain… and that is a fact…

Last night… no pain meds after dinner or after I took the partials out… I knew the tooth was likely dead after a week of being exposed to the elements and not getting much of a reaction to ice cream or hot coffee in the morning… the tooth was and is dead…. just chewing is a royal pain, trying to leave my cheek alone and not eat it…

So I had nightmares last night… I avoided food after dinner… drank little water and still was up and down all night… because of nightmares… good ole PTSD nightmares…

The pattern that has presented its self before, was one I didn’t get until I got my memories back… again it goes back to knowledge and I begged Freda and Peggy to talk… they would rather talk to their fictional god…. fear… always comes back to fear…. BOO!!!!

Tomorrow we find out if the buyers are committing to buying the house and we are under contract… we’ll leave the speculating for the religious… I have hope, that is all I can do… it is a buyer’s market right now… but it’s also a sellers market….

May 2018 my dentist recommended implants, since that time I have lost all the teeth on one side of my face… kind of look like the walking dead… it’s cumbersome, painful, insulting and most of all typical christian behavior… and I hope with all I am… the rest of America gets a taste of what Veterans have been living with since WWII!!!!

Hope springs eternal and with Trump at the wheel, it’s a matter of time… not IF….

The nightmare is full blown PTSD and it was about Big Springs, Texas and Montgomery, Alabama…. double boo Freda and Peggy!!!! Bite me you white bitch’s!!!

So not much sleep, but that’s okay, today is a busy day, getting ready to grab those two buyers… so I’ll sleep better tonight, because I’ll be worn out… I hope…

As I close this morning… I want to thank Hilo VA office for doing their job for once!!!! and trying to get me in for this extraction… fortunately for me… I got the doc to give me antibiotics and I can maintain until my appointment in October… The luxury of having the medical and dental training to treat myself…

If I had to rely on mans god or the government….. I would be 6 feet under… and since I am smarter than them… sorry to disappoint family…

Started the drops this morning for my eye surgery… scared and excited… I won’t be wearing eye glass’s after next week… just wow…but I won’t have any teeth… now that would be a picture….

Sgt. USAF DAV I Remember… Margie…