Adjusting to all that I am remembering and adapting to what my body has lived with for over 50 years… and learning all this in the last 23 months!!!
It’s a large amount of information to absorb and not go off your rocker…
Throw in a dash of PTSD and my cup runneth over….
Getting past the depression that held me back from the physical part… the lack of motivation to get off my ass and be active again, wasn’t because I couldn’t, it was because I couldn’t accept that any human would do what they did to that child at 13 years old….
And there are moments where I find it difficult to accept…. only because….
I don’t remember….
The MRI’s & MRA’s and bone scans and nerve induction tests… don’t lie…. the evience has always been there… just getting it all together and have the memories kick in too….
What are the odds??? After 50 years I would start remembering….
Accepting the damage done to my body by others is difficult for any survivor to do… because they didn’t do the damage to their own bodies, other humans did…. and you just want to go back in time and stop it from happening….
Been there and tried to do that… it doesn’t work… nor does praying it away or asking or begging gods to fix things… people are being murdered right now in Syria because of Trump & his christian base…. dude is worse than Hitler….
Only I can fix what is fixable… or at least get the doctors to recognize it and get a plan to fix it, which is what I requested from the VA in Aug an not a word… no Neuro, no Ortho…. with the bills in for my eye surgeries, I will have my doctor request through medicare…. enough of VA death care…..
Long day ahead, eye post op…. dental for wax try in for teeth placement…
The autonomic neuropathy is having a field day with the teeth missing…
I know for a fact, this would not be an issue with the missing teeth, if I didn’t have other damge to my esophagus from the boob incident and the sliding herniated stomach… I could deal… not so, when it was taken out of your control decades ago…. like I said, it got interesting when the VA bridge Little Rock did failed, an it was doomed from the get go… that was another traumatic event in a VA facility…. my dentist here was shocked the frontal bridge for 9 thru 11 teeth, lasted 9 years… it was never usable to eat and it constantly cut my lip… so over VA death care….
Long day ahead, back and forth, rain is miserable and flooding is happening north of us… hope all stay safe… the people on the mountain are getting hammered and the cost for them and the protest… hitting $10 million… and police response time is life threatening as we found out this week….
Already had fun on twitter… sad to see the GOP throw an allie under the bus… but they support Trump, so they support the extermination of the kurds…
christians are never held accountable for their corrupt religion and it’s ugly truths….mass hysteria is a real condition…. just look at mass suicides because of religion….
Sgt. USAF DAV I Remember… Margie